Caught some where between complete silence and 600 donuts i kept finding myself re-living days of the past in my noggin. Anyone else ever do that ?? The flash back that stood out the most to me was the day i was let go from a previous job. I can still see the whole day happening. I see me waking up completely dead to go to a class that i actually was excited about for once. Everyone that was normally mean was super nice. And then a few moments later it all went down hill. I remember seeing the faces of some dear friends and saying goodbye to that life i had there seemed so difficult. The tears never stopped for weeks and for a while it wasnt me missing the job it was me missing the friends.
Lets be real for a moment . No matter how much you try you can never be as close to people if they are taken out of your life. ( more like riped out ) Its hard to keep finding your self or to try to put yourself someone where that you just never are anymore. I miss the hugs . the laughs. the talks. the cakes. my long mondays with a special someone. and always for some reason or another the talks were always about my crazy life. I love you all !! Im sorry im not around nearly as much as i use to but it just keeps getting harder.
So now i find myself somewhere that... dont get me wrong im so happy with and i love the people in my life but its... just harder. Its crazy how money can make life so easy. It takes all the stress off. Its easier to laugh. Though now that im out of the old life i laugh more. Life just gets difficult and no matter how many good deeds you do some how it still hard. I look at the people who seem to have it so easy and wonder how they even complain. However here i am complaining and could have it a lot harder.
Phillipians 4:13 -
I know i can do all things threw christ!! So here i am im taking on the world!!
Today was such a good day. Just me and my girl jenn. We started it off with seeing the sex and the city 2 movie. Well what can i say but fabulous. I wanna be a writer like carrie. I want to have a collum and then write a few books. I want to give words of advice to the world. I want to tell my story. Well anyways Carrie mentioned something that i havent been able to stop thinking about all day. She was worried where the "Sparkle" went in there relationship? No one wants to be that old married couple but yet some couples ( almost all ) sometimes even before there married become that old married couple. It never fails that it starts the arguments and fights after that. Someones unhappy then they forget why they fell in love with the other in the first place. This moment of fighting is the true test of every relationship cause you usually come out soaring or.... crash and burn and there is no easy way out. No matter the relationship someone is hurt or left in a daze after every end. So how do you avoid the loss of sparkle? Do you need to lose it to put your relationship to the test ? And what if there never was a sparkle? Is it okay to love someone that doesnt set your heart on fire ?
